As a football fan, it is fun to sit in front of the tube and watch smash-mouth all day! Football is unique because you really do not get to see the faces under the helmets so it makes it kind of hard to recognize them when they are not in uniform. Fortunately for me, I went to Va Tech with Mike Vick and was able to enjoy his collegiate dominance.
If you ever been to Tech, especially in the 90s, the Black population was very small (less than 1%) and so we all knew each other or knew of each other. As popular as Mike was, he kept a low key persona. He never was the "life" of the party and that's if he ever attended any parties. If he did, you would not know it, he would be up against the wall somewhere with his teammates. I think in person one-on-one, he is a very humble, personable person while on the field he is a very confident football player, maybe arrogant but I think it is warranted.
We all know by now the story of this young man; he was caught and admitted to owning and running an illegal dog fighting kennel in a home he owned in his home state of Virginia. He went to jail for 2 years, declared bankruptcy, lost every endorsement he ever had, and pretty much became the devil to anyone who ever owned a pet.
Vick came out of jail and had to start completely over in all aspects of his life; he had to start over financially, he had to start over in the NFL, and he had to start over as a man. The Phildelphia Eagles recently signed him to a new $100 million dollar contract and Vick has also landed a lot of the same endorsement companies, e.g. Nike, that supported him before he went to jail.
Although my wonderful New York Giants stomped a mud hole in the Vick-led Eagles this past weekend, I have to admit, I was rooting for Vick to be successful, NOT WIN, but to be successful. I root for Vick when he is not playing against the G-men and not because he is a heck of a talent or because he is Black or because he went to Va Tech. I root for Vick because he stood up in front of the world and said he was wrong.
As a man, we often have a lot of pride and do not want to admit when we are in the wrong. Vick could have made up excuses or looked for sympathy like that idiot Plaxico Burress but he did not; he took sole responsibility for his actions, served his time like a man and came back and has rededicated himself to the sport he loves. He surrounded himself with people who cared for him and will show him the right way and I am sure he has had to turn his back to the folks he thought had his (not an easy thing to do).
Vick did rule #1 in Man Code Law and that is admitting when you are wrong. We can all learn a thing or two from this man because we all are not perfect. We all make mistakes or lose our way sometimes and that is okay. It is the willingness to admit the wrongs and make them right.
If Vick never wins another NFL game, he will always be a winner on and off the field and will always have my support as a fellow man. Eddie Robinson coached the Grambling State University football team for over 40 years and is one of the winningest coaches in college football history. He said something to a reporter one day after a game, he said, "I just dont want to win the game, I want to win the guy." Eddie Robinson did not want to just beat his opponent but he wanted his opponents respect and admiration and that he achieved.
I think Vick has won the guy.
Monday, September 26, 2011
Monday, September 19, 2011
The Approach: A Collabo With Ms. Millita Wright
The Washington DC Metropolitan Area (The DMV) is a wonderful
city to meet members of the opposite sex.
Now, I am not being totally honest here; the female to male ratio here
is around five to one and I am being generous so the DMV is really a great city
FOR men to meet women. This scenario
tends to create an atmosphere of continuous courting or lack thereof.
Men grow up under the notion that when we want something we
just go after it. Second place just
means you are the first loser and any woman worth having is worth working
for. Those sentiments stick with us for
a long time. We see these things play
out in bars, clubs, churches, grocery stores everywhere.
But men, we just don’t know how to act when we do come in
second place. Men believe that if we
just go be ourselves and go after what we want, we should win; until that first
rejection that changes everything.
Some men have been rejected more times than they can count
so approaching a woman is like breathing to them. Other men fear rejection more than they fear
God. If given a choice between being
rejected and stealing from their Mother, well, Mommy better hold on to her
clutch real tight!!!!
I, along with fellow blogger Millita Wright, will break down
both sides of this man/woman thing so we can all win and still feel like a man
at the end.
Lounge Scenario
Chris is with his pal Ed at a lounge and across the room
sitting by herself is Val. Val is
gorgeous, hard-working and has had a long week.
She is sipping on a Ketel One and Tonic with a lime wedge half full,
hair is up, exhaustion on her face.
Chris has proclaimed to Ed that he has seen his future wife. Ed tells Chris to be a man and go get
married! Chris approaches with another Ketel One in hand and this is what
transpires:
Chris: Good Evening,
my name is Chris. You must be my future
girlfriend…
Val: (smirks) Hi Chris…(thinking to
herself….that line is the worse!)
Chris: Do you have a
name?
Val: Chris, I am Val.
I certainly know it took quite a bit of
courage for you to come over here, drink in hand, and strike up a conversation…
but I have had a long day and I am just not interested in small talk.
Chris: Oh okay, what
do you do for a living that has you so tired?
You too fine to be this tired…
Val: Okay
Chris…(annoyed) maybe I wasn’t clear the first time. I am not interested and I would like to be
left alone…
After walking away rejected and dejected, Chris goes about
his business. Later that evening he sees
Joe Corny talking to Val at the bar and she is all cheese and smiles. Chris does not understand and will probably go
about being an a**hole to women for the rest of his life because he put himself
out there with all sincerity and was kicked to the curb.
Ms. Millita Wright...
What is the woman’s perspective?
Chris approached Val, assumed she
wanted another drink and had no idea why she was sitting chilling by herself.
Chris walked up with a lame line and hoped it would work. Instead of being cool
and just feeling her out…he chose to hit her with a line from the inception of
the conversation. If Chris walked by and said hello and waited for the eye
contact perhaps, he could have spared himself some rejection and heartbreak.
Women like for a man to be
confident enough to talk to her but also savvy enough to read the non-verbal
clues she gives.
As women, we also have to be crystal
clear about what we want and not be ambiguous…when approached by a guy as Val
was in the scenario, it is quite easy to just blow off a guy…but it’s a fine art.
How can you say “no” nicely but not give off the impression that you are
willing to have a conversation at a later date? One of my favorite lines is one
that I smile genuinely, look the guy straight in the eyes and say “Thank you
but I am all set and not interested…”
It’s a nicer no, but it usually leaves no room for a rebuttal….I then LEAVE
the area…Not only does this eliminate the opportunity to hear a bad name
blurted out , but it also keeps me from having to continue to explain myself
and say no thanks in several different ways…
Advice to the Guys:
If you walk up on a random woman,
read her body language…what is it telling you? Does she seem approachable? Did
she give you eye contact and did she seem to invite you over without physically
motioning with her finger? If she has the stink look on her face, it’s probably
a good idea to keep it moving for the next one…
I admit, some women are quite rude, couple that with the some negative energy
and there’s your unapproachable
one! ….but there is HOPE!! Filtering through all the smoke and mirrors will
prove success! Just read the non-verbal
signs...
Monday, September 12, 2011
Come On Coach, Put Me In!
One of the more enjoyable things about living in this area (DMV) are the fans devoted to their Washington Redskins. Fact: The Washington Redskins are the fourth losing-est franchise in the 2000s and yet every season, according to their fanbase, they are Super Bowl Bound!! Washington Redskin fans are a true testament to blind Faith, Will, and disillusion but I love 'em the same. If you live in the DMV area, you ever notice how sad everyone is when they lose? Seriously, a good portion of this area works for the federal government in some capacity and when the Skins lose, the government mine as well shut down because no on is coming to work on Monday.
I just hope they win around the first and 15th of every month so payroll is still ran!!!!
There are plenty of other fans here in this area and if you walk into any bar in the Happy Hour Capital of the world, you will find a group of devoted fans to any of the 32 teams. In the mix somewhere will always be a Redskins fan.
In the excitement of a new football season, I have come up with some rules/guidelines for all to follow when being a "fan" on NFL Sundays!
1. No Bandwagoners. I hate it when I see a bunch of "Packer" fans all of a sudden emerge and Aaron Rodgers is now the greatest thing since sliced bread! If you are going to be a fan, be one and not only when they are winning, but like any devoted Redskin fan, you must stick with your team through decades of losing!
2. Please, when you decide to wear your team's jersey, the jersey must have the name of someone on the CURRENT roster. I saw a lot of Donovan McNabb Redskin jerseys yesterday and that man plays for the Vikings now #fail. Exceptions to the rule, throwbacks of ex-football greats are allowed. For example, a Joe Namath Jets jersey is sanctioned.
3. If you are having a football gathering at the house, you are required to bring a beverage or libation of choice for the group, not just a personal stash! At this same gathering, ladies are allowed IF AND ONLY IF, they do not nag, bother, or make request during gametime. Talking is allowed during commercials and halftime ONLY!
4. I can't stand it when I go to a bar and the random fan fanatic starts giving me stats on every player on the team dating back to when Christ was a child. Dude, I am hear to WATCH the game; if I wanted to listen to John Madden the whole time, I would have stayed home.
5. Ok, I am at the bar watching the Skins and Giants and I see a Skins fan at the bar and he pulls something out of his pocket. After a closer look, this guy pulled out a PENALTY FLAG from his back pocket and yes, it was florescent like what you see on TV. Oh, it gets better, he also had a red flag for "challenges" and he would pull these flags out when he thought it was appropriate. Look, I am fan just like the next man; a jersey, some face paint, hat, even football gloves I can let you get away with but PENALTY FLAGS, NO!!! Thats a flag on the play, penalty is pretending you are in the game re-living your glory days. LET IT GO!!!!
Please feel free to add to this list!!!
I just hope they win around the first and 15th of every month so payroll is still ran!!!!
There are plenty of other fans here in this area and if you walk into any bar in the Happy Hour Capital of the world, you will find a group of devoted fans to any of the 32 teams. In the mix somewhere will always be a Redskins fan.
In the excitement of a new football season, I have come up with some rules/guidelines for all to follow when being a "fan" on NFL Sundays!
1. No Bandwagoners. I hate it when I see a bunch of "Packer" fans all of a sudden emerge and Aaron Rodgers is now the greatest thing since sliced bread! If you are going to be a fan, be one and not only when they are winning, but like any devoted Redskin fan, you must stick with your team through decades of losing!
2. Please, when you decide to wear your team's jersey, the jersey must have the name of someone on the CURRENT roster. I saw a lot of Donovan McNabb Redskin jerseys yesterday and that man plays for the Vikings now #fail. Exceptions to the rule, throwbacks of ex-football greats are allowed. For example, a Joe Namath Jets jersey is sanctioned.
3. If you are having a football gathering at the house, you are required to bring a beverage or libation of choice for the group, not just a personal stash! At this same gathering, ladies are allowed IF AND ONLY IF, they do not nag, bother, or make request during gametime. Talking is allowed during commercials and halftime ONLY!
4. I can't stand it when I go to a bar and the random fan fanatic starts giving me stats on every player on the team dating back to when Christ was a child. Dude, I am hear to WATCH the game; if I wanted to listen to John Madden the whole time, I would have stayed home.
5. Ok, I am at the bar watching the Skins and Giants and I see a Skins fan at the bar and he pulls something out of his pocket. After a closer look, this guy pulled out a PENALTY FLAG from his back pocket and yes, it was florescent like what you see on TV. Oh, it gets better, he also had a red flag for "challenges" and he would pull these flags out when he thought it was appropriate. Look, I am fan just like the next man; a jersey, some face paint, hat, even football gloves I can let you get away with but PENALTY FLAGS, NO!!! Thats a flag on the play, penalty is pretending you are in the game re-living your glory days. LET IT GO!!!!
Please feel free to add to this list!!!
Monday, September 5, 2011
The Essence of Ogling
We are all human, well women tend to think that men are from another planet, even another species. I am here to tell you that at some point, I actually thought they were right!!!! But I came back to my senses and just accepted that men and women are just different. One glaring difference seems to be in the form of staring or what has been termed the Ogle.
This special sixth sense for man has been studied, dissected, and microscoped to its very end and it has been determined that Ogling is part of a man's DNA. Yes, National Geographic has determined that a certain strand in a man's DNA is programmed for the Ogle. Since science has determined that this cannot be changed, removed, or erased from our being, we should just accept it and all get along!!! But I am fair and would love to dive into the rules and parameters that men should follow if they are going to ogle without offending the one they love.
The Essence...
Situation 1: Husband and wife walking down the street, husband sees very attractive woman in a tight skirt, long nice legs, C-cups and a smile in some 4-inch heels. Does he do:
a. turn around as she walks by
b. as she walks by he merely just moves his eyes
c. close his eyes and hopes he doesn't trip
Answer:
B - As she walks by, he is ALLOWED a quick glance with the eyes which should take all of .06 seconds.
Situation 2: From above, if wife sees the glance, he should:
a. Lie and say he didnt see anything
b. Smile and pretend she is not talking
c. Ask wife what she thinks about her outfit
Answer:
C - You have now bought yourself more time to ogle if you ask the wife to look at her too; while she looks at her dress, you can "look" at her dress too. Sidenote - the longer the conversation, the longer the ogle.
Situation 3: Husband and wife are out to eat at Ruth's Chris (hopefully she is paying) and a gorgeous, college co-ed is your server. She is now at your table taking your order. Do you:
a. Drop the menu you were reading and give her the head lean
b. Give her extra small talk while burning a hole in her chest with your eyes
c. Quickly greet and immediately turn ALL attention to your wife
Answer:
C - If you want to keep the taste buds in your mouth long enough to enjoy that primerib you want to order, you will immediately acknowledge (to yourself) how gorgeous the server is and then immediately turn to your wife until said threat has left the table.
These rules and others are not just for married couples, they apply to any "relationship" whether you are on a first date or have been married 50 years.
Are there other situations that men need to know what to do in order to at least remain respectful? Now, the only answer that will not work is "Just don't ogle!" That's just impossible because National Geographic proved it is in our DNA.
This special sixth sense for man has been studied, dissected, and microscoped to its very end and it has been determined that Ogling is part of a man's DNA. Yes, National Geographic has determined that a certain strand in a man's DNA is programmed for the Ogle. Since science has determined that this cannot be changed, removed, or erased from our being, we should just accept it and all get along!!! But I am fair and would love to dive into the rules and parameters that men should follow if they are going to ogle without offending the one they love.
The Essence...
Situation 1: Husband and wife walking down the street, husband sees very attractive woman in a tight skirt, long nice legs, C-cups and a smile in some 4-inch heels. Does he do:
a. turn around as she walks by
b. as she walks by he merely just moves his eyes
c. close his eyes and hopes he doesn't trip
Answer:
B - As she walks by, he is ALLOWED a quick glance with the eyes which should take all of .06 seconds.
Situation 2: From above, if wife sees the glance, he should:
a. Lie and say he didnt see anything
b. Smile and pretend she is not talking
c. Ask wife what she thinks about her outfit
Answer:
C - You have now bought yourself more time to ogle if you ask the wife to look at her too; while she looks at her dress, you can "look" at her dress too. Sidenote - the longer the conversation, the longer the ogle.
Situation 3: Husband and wife are out to eat at Ruth's Chris (hopefully she is paying) and a gorgeous, college co-ed is your server. She is now at your table taking your order. Do you:
a. Drop the menu you were reading and give her the head lean
b. Give her extra small talk while burning a hole in her chest with your eyes
c. Quickly greet and immediately turn ALL attention to your wife
Answer:
C - If you want to keep the taste buds in your mouth long enough to enjoy that primerib you want to order, you will immediately acknowledge (to yourself) how gorgeous the server is and then immediately turn to your wife until said threat has left the table.
These rules and others are not just for married couples, they apply to any "relationship" whether you are on a first date or have been married 50 years.
Are there other situations that men need to know what to do in order to at least remain respectful? Now, the only answer that will not work is "Just don't ogle!" That's just impossible because National Geographic proved it is in our DNA.
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