Fellas, you have finally landed the woman of your "dreams" and she is all that and a bag of salt 'n' vinegar chips. First couple of months you want to dazzle and woo her in ways you THINK she has never been before. You are so into her that when the fellas invite you out for a "Boys Nite Out", you flake out at the last minute because your new squeeze needs you to come with her to Bed, Bath, and Beyond to look at some new drapes and towels for her bathroom.
Is this acceptable behavior for a man to cancel out on his homeboys for his woman?
Does it make a difference what stage the man and woman are at in their relationship, i.e. girlfriend, Fiance, Wife?
Is it okay for the homeboys to dog him out for said "weak" and "punk" behavior?
SPEAK OUT!!!!
I would say if you are married your priorities are to your wife and her times is yours and yours is hers. There is always compromise in a healthy relationship and wouldn't expect anything less from my significant other.
ReplyDeleteMy crew are my significant others. They have been with me for awhile through good and bad times. We don't have to hang out as tough as when I was single if I'm pursuing a serious relationship or have evolved into a more mature relationship with my girlfriend. The homeboys dogging you is pretty much a given. It's like Jay and Grand Marnier. I won't use that as a basis for my decision making as a grown ass man. It really comes down to time management and how to make the many pieces in my life's puzzle coexist in harmony. Actually it sounds like a great problem to have. I have that many people who love and want to be with me at once. Now that's a blessing.
I second that Mack... It’s always much better to have LOVE coming at you from all different angles. Balance, compromise and understanding are key elements for every relationship, but (the strong BUT) there is always room for a little “me time”… Even if you are married with children, the “me time” may help to put things into perspective. Growing into your new relationship, that space may be just what the doctor ordered. It is just as important to give the relationship some breathing room. Afterall, absence makes the heart grow fonder, and when in doubt Let go and Let God!
ReplyDelete~Molly~
It's gonna happen, you'll have to cancel on your homeboys at some point, if for no other reason than to keep the peace at "home". But...that should not have to be a regular occurrence in your relationship with wifey and your boys. Your relationship with your friends is important, as is the relationship with wifey...there should be a balance, not a forced choosing of one over the other. They are both important in different ways as are the unique bonds between man & his boys and man & his woman. In a healthy relationship, both partners help to keep each other balanced by encouraging "girl time" and "fellas time" as well as "date night" with each other.
ReplyDelete